I am not a positive person. In fact, I stress out over the little things, I let them block my mind, even my body, and all I can do is cry my eyes out. That’s what I’ve been doing for the past two years.
One day I asked my Soul Sister: one month of unhappiness it too long, isn’t it?
And barely did I know that it would be the beginning of these past two horrible years, when I woke up almost everyday feeling sad, expecting nothing good, always wishing that tomorrow would be better.
So, when my whole world fell apart, I thought that life sucks, indeed, but maybe people are right and I can’t go deeper in this black hole I’m in. I’ve hit rock bottom. It took a while and I have thought several times that I was already there, but actually, no. Yesterday was the day to go there.
The only way is up again, as they say in the song.
I stressed out, I cried so hard for the man who dumped me and for the job that I had just lost, my head was about to explode, my eyes are now so puffy that I look like a stuffed teddy bear, but I had to calm down and try to see the light on the other side of the storm.
I did what I do better in times like these: I planned and I made some short and medium term decisions.
- Not allow myself to spend a whole day without going out of my house:
- Go to the gym everyday (I already made my new plan for a whole month) by foot
- Keep my tutoring classes and search for more while I don’t find a job
- Attend my volunteering activity once a week
- Accept any invitations for some fun
- Make healthy meals and snacks
- Send at least 15 applications every afternoon
- Spend one or two weeks in London with my brother and my sister in law (bringing some resumes with me)
- Spend one or two weeks in Lisbon with my friends (bringing some resumes with me)
I know this is not a very complete plan, but it will get me through the next month, I guess. I also know that I won’t heal my broken hear and my crushed ego in just one month, but that’s a start. And that’s what I need: something to make me wake up everyday and help me dealing with these two pieces of destruction that were so nicely offered to me.